This makes my heart happy!
The deck furniture is ready to be relaxed and sat in!
(we had lunch on the deck yesterday!)
The sprinkler is watering the newly seeded grass!
And it is SUNNY and WARM!!!!
But Josie said it best…..
“I can FINALLY be outside!!!”
It has been a long cold winter! But spring is here.
The promise of new life.
But this past week has been hard though with facing what “new” life truly means for Josie.
Josie’s seizures are FINALLY under control! (Praise God!) BUT now that we are out of survival mode and not dealing with medical “emergencies” I was once again realizing, on a whole new level, this week that caring for her is going to be a LONG TERM thing.
Even though she is “better” she will never be able to live on her own.
Of course we “knew” this before but during the seizure phase we were just trying to survive and were living day to day.
And she was only really getting “settled” and acclimated to America and her new family when the seizures started.
But now reality is truly hitting me. And it is a hard thing to process.
Now that she is “healthy” again I was struggling with the future and what it will look like.
Especially after she was telling me how she wants to move out and live on her own someday.
And how she can’t wait to drive when she is 16.
But those things will never be….unless God heals her from her cerebral palsy.
But last night I was reading in Beth Moore’s book, Believing God Day by Day and it was just what I needed to soothe my overwhelmed spirit.
“God alone can give us the daily dose of grace not to grow bitter in a long-term battle. But Satan will do everything he can to try keeping us from receiving the grace God extends.”
Daily doses of Grace is what I need. And to guard against the overwhelming feelings I get when I think about the future. To just live for today.
But I do need wisdom in knowing how to answer her so she isn’t discouraged but enabled.
She is dif-abled.
So instead of using the sidewalk chalk on the driveway like “typical” kids.
She gets to make designs on the side of our old, falling down barn.
And someday she may go and live in a group home, with a helper aide.
And maybe she will be an amazing Walmart greeter.
But whatever she does she will be doing exactly what God wants her to do.
To bring light into a dark world and speak volumes to others just by being who she is.
“Every effort we make to love sacrificially never fails to get the priority attention of God, to ultimately and undoubtedly be rewarded, and to have a profound effect either in the person we are trying to love or in the circumstance.
Or in us.”